Hair today, gone tomorrow
Well it is happening, I am losing my hair. I knew it was coming but that doesn't make it any less shocking when you literally pull handfuls of your own hair out of your head. It isn't like I am all that attached to my hair and it is obvious it isn't all that attached to me now either, Ba dum bump but I have to admit it was somewhat of an emotional set back when it started happening. I think my hair always kind of looked like a wig anyway so hopefully the wig I get will look more like real hair on me, stranger things have happened right?
I think the problem I have with this is the "no hair" thing is the tell tale sign that I have cancer. Now everyone will know. I am not ashamed or embarrassed to have cancer but I do feel that it makes me appear weak and thusfar no one would even have a clue I was a cancer patient by looking at me. I like it that way, it makes me feel stronger and strength is my greatest ally right now.
I know it is a vanity thing but it is still very hard to accept, it almost is like losing an appendage or something, I have to remain optimistic though as it isn't like losing a finger or something, it will grow back.
This too will pass, I will get used to having no hair and God willing I will grow bigger, better hair after my treatments are done and for now I will wear wigs and bandanas (I think I may even get myself a Simon T skull cap for the colder weather, do you think I will be as sexy in it as he is? Maybe the big T will offer me one of the tea cozies he wears on his head on stage???)
You know I shouldn't be telling any of you this because the talent of the wig makers today is unbelievable, this is an artform! I don't think many would have a clue I was even wearing one if I didn't open my big mouth. This is where I have a problem being a woman, I almost feel like I am betraying my sisters by telling this. So much of a womans appearance is all smoke and mirrors anyway. Padded bras, girdles, spray on tans, make up, weaves, fake nails, implants, collagen the list is endless. I don't think men can even begin to fathom the depths woman will go to for the illusion of perfection. The Casbah Club sings about wanting a sex change to understand women, boys you can't handle that truth, trust me! I will don a wig, for the sake of my kids, so I appear normal to them and their friends, I will wear a wig for strangers so they don't feel the need to pity me as we pass in the aisle of the supermarket, I will wear a wig for myself so I feel and appear normal. The nice thing about this is I don't have to wear a wig for anyone, the people who love me will also get used to seeing me this way and accept me and love me in spite of my being bald.
This is also one other thing that is proof positive to me that God is a man! I tell you this, someone will have some answering to do if I have to shave, wax or pluck any part of my body once the hair on my head goes! If I lose the hair on my head then in fairness I should lose it everywhere else too, if not I'm gonna be pissed!
I think the problem I have with this is the "no hair" thing is the tell tale sign that I have cancer. Now everyone will know. I am not ashamed or embarrassed to have cancer but I do feel that it makes me appear weak and thusfar no one would even have a clue I was a cancer patient by looking at me. I like it that way, it makes me feel stronger and strength is my greatest ally right now.
I know it is a vanity thing but it is still very hard to accept, it almost is like losing an appendage or something, I have to remain optimistic though as it isn't like losing a finger or something, it will grow back.
This too will pass, I will get used to having no hair and God willing I will grow bigger, better hair after my treatments are done and for now I will wear wigs and bandanas (I think I may even get myself a Simon T skull cap for the colder weather, do you think I will be as sexy in it as he is? Maybe the big T will offer me one of the tea cozies he wears on his head on stage???)
You know I shouldn't be telling any of you this because the talent of the wig makers today is unbelievable, this is an artform! I don't think many would have a clue I was even wearing one if I didn't open my big mouth. This is where I have a problem being a woman, I almost feel like I am betraying my sisters by telling this. So much of a womans appearance is all smoke and mirrors anyway. Padded bras, girdles, spray on tans, make up, weaves, fake nails, implants, collagen the list is endless. I don't think men can even begin to fathom the depths woman will go to for the illusion of perfection. The Casbah Club sings about wanting a sex change to understand women, boys you can't handle that truth, trust me! I will don a wig, for the sake of my kids, so I appear normal to them and their friends, I will wear a wig for strangers so they don't feel the need to pity me as we pass in the aisle of the supermarket, I will wear a wig for myself so I feel and appear normal. The nice thing about this is I don't have to wear a wig for anyone, the people who love me will also get used to seeing me this way and accept me and love me in spite of my being bald.
This is also one other thing that is proof positive to me that God is a man! I tell you this, someone will have some answering to do if I have to shave, wax or pluck any part of my body once the hair on my head goes! If I lose the hair on my head then in fairness I should lose it everywhere else too, if not I'm gonna be pissed!
posted by Meg at 5:15 PM
6 Comments:
Always remember your true strength lies within you not upon your head.
How is it Meg, that you can always make me laugh, even when talking about something so discouraging as losing your hair and having cancer? That last sentence you posted was priceless!
You sound good. But then you always do. Obviously, you aren't related to Samson, cuz he lost his strenght when he lost his hair. But you my dear, you are just as strong , if not stronger. I commend you. You know your name means "strong"? It does. I know that because you and my daughter share the same name. You were aptly named.
So, you are going to the 2nd MSG show? I saw you have great seats! How much did those babies cost???? Dang! Rachel's talking about doing a gig there for In The Attic. (Not at MSG, duh, but somewhere small.) Are you going to that too?
Hi Meg. What a great post. I understand the emotional drop you talk about, but you just seem to have your focus and priorities so right, and your humour shines through.
When I see someone who's lost hair as a result of chemo, I don't see weakness - I see the strength they're finding to fight the disease. Maybe you could see the temporary loss of your hair as a jettisoning of something non-essential so your body can concentrate on getting well again.
Wear whatever you feel comfortable in, whether it's a wig, scarves, beanies, berets or just your own skin, and change the look to suit your mood. There are no rules. Think of it as a fashion opportunity - you can get some pretty funky looks with all of them!
And yes, your hair will grow back stronger - I've seen it happen so often. Funnily enough, it seems to curl a bit more, too. Don't know what that's about - maybe it wants to have more fun second time around?
Take care and stay wonderful,
M x
ps: I've often wondered about other body hair. I've never favoured the bald pubic look, but I could do without waxing my legs or underarms ever again!
>God willing I will grow bigger, better hair after my treatments are done
You know it grows back curly, don't you? :)
Stay strong!
I'm with you - I'd expect a complete hairless body too if I had to loose it on my head! I've known people who's hair came in completly different afterwards. Maybe you'll end up with hair like Chers... wait a minute those are wigs! Have fun with it.. now's your chance to storm Frederick of Hollywoods for their wig collection! ;-)
Hello my sweetheart!
What a great post, you describe your feelings in such a straightforward way that I had goosebumps all the time.
The hair loss is not a vanity thing, I can completely understand. It is what is associated with it, I know. But, if you are going to get better with the treatments then the hair loss is the least problem. Hair grows back. And thank God for those wonderful wig makers. Although I'd go for the Simon T wooly hat, lol.
Your writing makes me so proud of you, especially when you write with your special witty way. Keep on doing that, I think it's therapeutic for the soul, which for me is very important.
I am saying bye-bye to you for now, I'm flying to Athens tomorrow and when I come back I want to see that everything is going OK and you are still your wonderful you.
Lots of love,
xoxoxo
M
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